The amazing partner who gets all your quirks. A beautiful wedding. A kid or two. Growing old together. Happily ever-after.
It's a gorgeous dream. You've imagined it so many times. Any day now your life will begin...
You love the dream, but hate the waiting. It is the waiting that often leads you to make poor relationship decisions. Why? Because you are afraid of the big dream not coming true.
This fear leads to:
Fantasizing about a person you haven't met
Dating emotionally unavailable people
Any and every friends-with-benefits arrangement
Staying in unhealthy relationships
All of the above seem easier than the possibility that your love life dream won't work out. Spiritually speaking, you are so attached to the fear of failing romantically (being alone) that you are missing all of your blessings (every opportunity for lasting, loving partnership). In other words, you are so afraid of failing that you settle for relationship dissatisfaction.
In the end, your love life has little to do with timing and everything to do with your peace of mind.
So how do you get peace of mind? You have a back-up plan. (In spiritual-speak, you detach from the outcome.) Having a back-up plan is saying to the Universe: “Even if I never meet my soulmate, I am going to enjoy being single.”
This type of thinking, preserves your mental well-being and keeps your heart open to healthy love in every form that it may come. You no longer have to be afraid of failing at love (and as a result making poor relationship decisions), because you know that you will still have a fulfilling life even if the big dream never comes true.
So create your back-up plan.
1. Even if I don't have my dream love I will still... (ie travel, go to concerts, host parties, buy a home, be a parent...)
2. What are 3 things you can do to start enjoying being single?
3. Pick a day of the week. Call it an anniversary. On this day, you will celebrate being in a relationship with yourself. Do something special for you. (Even if you just buy yourself a book, flowers or a tasty cup cake- make it memorable.)
Here's the miracle in having a back-up plan, the juicy spiritual truth- you won't ever need it. The act of detaching puts you in alignment with that which you are seeking. So don't be surprised if you suddenly find yourself in lasting, loving partnership.